Google Searching for Elf on the Shelf

by Marinka on December 3, 2012

Do you know from the hell that is Elf on the Shelf? Well, I wrote about it last year and over the past week or so I’ve noticed that it has been getting some traffic. Which is normal, I guess- a masterpiece will often find its audience. Oh, and maybe it’s also Elf on the Shelf season now, too (which apparently is not the same as Elf on the Shelf Hunting Season. GOOD TO KNOW.)

Here are some search terms that have landed people on my Elf on the Shelf post. Read them and weep. For humanity. And then hug your elf. If you have nothing better to do.

I’m guessing because he’s an inanimate object.

Haters gonna hate.

Let me guess: He didn’t move.

He’s a minor! Hands off, please.

Yeah, but he’s not the one Googling this shit online.

Hey, words hurt…inanimate objects.

Erm..totally! Damn!

Hello, ten foot pole! I’m not touching this one with you. Love, Marinka

Oh yeah? Well, why don’t you sit on the shelf and see how smart you are!

Yeah, that’s what you think! And it certainly wasn’t watching you sleep or anything!

Happy Elfing!

One year ago ...

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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

Mama D December 3, 2012 at 10:08 pm

I curse the inventor of this Elf. Since I would never remember to move the damned thing (and have better things to do than spending an hour setting an elf up in eg a mini-marshmallow bubble bath) I refuse to buy one! 😉


December 3, 2012 at 10:13 pm

We have never had an Elf on the Shelf in residence, and we never will. As far as I know, my kids have no idea what an Elf on the Shelf is. And I’ll cut any bitch who tells them.


frogmama December 4, 2012 at 9:41 am

I was thisclose to getting the damn thing because everyone and their mother has one and raves about it. Now I’m not so sure. Maybe I’ll jump jimmy one up with a tampon and some paint or something.


joeinvegas December 4, 2012 at 10:03 am

Are you sure he isn’t watching? Those are big eyes. Perhaps he has a blog too where all the elves exchange stories about the people in their houses. (and apartments)


Susi December 4, 2012 at 10:18 am

No elf in our house… not now or ever. Luckily, my older kids just don’t care anymore and the little one doesn’t know any better! I’ve been reading too many horror stories to fall for its “charm”…


the mama bird diaries
December 4, 2012 at 2:34 pm

I mourn the day I bought that dumb thing. Please let this fad end.


anna see December 4, 2012 at 4:28 pm

we don’t have a crazy ass elf on the shelf, but we do have my husband’s elves from norway from when he was a kid. now it’s all in fashion to have these “elves on a shelf” hiding around the house. i ‘ve been trying to hide them from my classy tone on tone christmas decor for almost 20 years.


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