Guest Blogger: Mama

by Marinka on March 25, 2009

I called mama. She wasn’t overly enthusiastic about being my guest blogger, but finally, she agreed to let me interview her. “So long as it’s not too stressful”.

Marinka: Just please speak English.

Mama: Oh, crap.

Mama, what do you like most about America?

Och, not again.

What do you mean not again?

Because someone just asked me about this recently. I love everything. If you want the answers to questions, speak to papa.

I already spoke to papa. Let me ask you, how are American women and Russian women different?

American women they’re fat.

Russian women are skinny?

Of course. They skinny and they dress better even they don’t have this abundance of what you have, this cosmetics and everything.

How do you know the word “abundance”?

I learned it from TV. Everything that is good in me, I learned from TV. All my vocabulary.

What is your favorite TV show?

Two Men and Half.

How come you don’t use the computer?

I don’t feel necessity yet. I’m ok. I ‘m reading books.

Do you remember when I was a teenager and I asked you what fellatio was and you told me the only thing I should put into my mouth is a fork and a toothbrush?

How smart I was!

Why did you say that?

I don’t know, It’s not kosher. I still have same advice for young girls. And I don’t think young girls ask their mothers.

Who should they ask?

They should ask, maybe their priest or rabbi? No, you have to ask mother, but what can you say to young girl?

Any words of wisdom for my readers?

Enjoy life.

What kind of people do you think read blogs?

I can’t say.

You can!

Since I’m not enjoying computer, I can’t relate to blog, so I can’t say who be enjoying. If you’re enjoying, it’s a fun. I consider it a waste of time.

Thanks, Mama!

One year ago ...

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