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Monday Afternoon. My apartment.
Hey, Mama, guess where I went on Sunday?
Bloomingdale’s.
How did you know?
Because you called me from there and said “I at Bloomingdale’s and feel like teenager.”
I didn’t say that.
You said something about teenager.
I said that I hadn’t been there since I was a teenager.
That was long ago.
Yes, thank you. But guess what I got there?
Clothes.
Mama, you are psychic!
Let me see what you got.
I got two skirts and a pair of pants.
Good, you need new clothes. I don’t understand what you wear, it is not flattering.
It was a huge sale.
Oh?
Really. Everything was marked down and then I got the presale price, which meant an additional 30% off.
This I like. Let me see.
I don’t have it.
I don’t have it what?
I don’t have the clothes.
Why? You no buy?
No, I bought. But to get the presale price I have to come back on Friday to pick it up.
So you go on Friday and you buy then?
No, I already paid. I just go to pick up the clothes on Friday.
You give them money and they keep clothes?
Y..yes.
You are a terrible shopper.
I got a receipt.
Oh, receipt. This is cause for celebration. Receipt. Paper receipt!
I’m sure the clothes will be there on Friday…
Yes. President of Bloomingdale’s will be waiting for you at front door. Welcome, Marinka, we are expecting you.
::Gulp::
Now I’m super worried that when I go to Bloomingdale’s to reclaim my clothes, they will laugh at me and my receipt.
And to kill the time waiting for Friday get here, I’ve been watching this new video from Coca Cola about their newest installment of the Happiness Factory series. Since I was born behind the Iron Curtain, I remember my very first Coke. It was when I went to Tbilisi to visit Mama’s family. They had Coke in tiny glass bottles and I fell in love.
The video is called “The Great Happyfication†and it tells you the secrets of happiness. Take a look! And feel free to put on some eyelashes and dance along.
{ 17 comments… read them below or add one }
Twitter: Peajaye
September 28, 2011 at 12:44 am
The girl in the Coke ad has eyelashes but no eyes. Which is just one of the many disturbing elements of the ad.
Also disturbing: paying for clothes and not taking them with you, which I could understand if you were having them tailored. But you weren’t.
I’m blaming your caffeinated ass-pants for all this.
Twitter: Littlebabyblog
September 28, 2011 at 12:57 am
I had the distinct displeasure of working at Bloomingdales here on the West Coast, and I CANNOT TELL YOU how many times I had to explain presales to people. They were the bane of my existence. But don’t worry, we *hardly ever* lost someone’s clothes. And we only laughed when people would come in for pickup and spend double what they had planned on because they had to come back. Its genius in it’s evil, really.
Oh, I see what happened to you now.
I bet that you did not have sweaty money in your fist.
Oh, please tell me this is an exact transcription of the conversation between you and mama. I’m having much trouble to stiffle my laughter behind the computer…
Wait, that’s Wendi? and she’s giving Baklava??? oh, <3!
Also, everything Peajaye said about the shopping etc.
Shana Tova, darling!
Twitter: marta28
September 28, 2011 at 10:00 am
I’ve done the presale at Gap many times before (which is significantly less glamorous than Bloomingdales but it was for children’s clothing you see) and they always have my clothes. It is a little odd though paying for something that you don’t actually get to have until a few days later.
I love coke. So much.
I don’t get it. If they let you pay the lower price before the sale, why can’t you take the clothes home? Why not just wait for the sale to start?
I’ve failed shopping, haven’t I?
Oh, and Shana Tova!
Twitter: gdrpempress
September 28, 2011 at 10:57 am
Oh, how could mama understand…money for nothing…if I don’t understand.
Poor Marinka.
What I do love is the memories of those little bottles of ice cold cokes for a dime that we could get at the little grocery stores on every corner.
Really, there were little grocery stores on every corner back them.
We’d run with a handful of pennies and nickels, and get a little adorable bottle of coke.
They really were sweeter times…
Twitter: NonaNelson
September 28, 2011 at 1:48 pm
My mother would only drink Coke from those adorable little glass bottles. She swore it tasted better. I think she was right.
I won’t even TELL you what’s in store for you. I’m sending Valuim, Aleve, and a HUGE box of wine.
Just in case.
Twitter: jmcguire5
September 29, 2011 at 1:14 am
Nordstroms does this before their huge Anniversary sale but it’s been so long since I’ve shopped for myself I can’t even remember what it feels like to hold a shopping bag unless it’s for one of my children.
And I’ll take a diet coke please.
I really love your mother. I could read the things she says all day long.
Twitter: gonnakillhim
September 29, 2011 at 10:58 am
This is not how I recall layaway working…
But it’s been a long time since I was a teenager too.
Am I the only one who watched that video and seriously wondered what the powers-that-be were smoking when they created it? Not that I didn’t enjoy it -my children particularly loved the character playing the nose clarinets – but I gotta say I think there was a little something extra special in the creator’s Coca-Cola!!
I’m so sad I wasn’t there to enjoy the shopping with you!