The Holiday That Everyone Hates

by Marinka on February 11, 2009

I have a few important updates about Nicki, our feline companion. She has a cold. And she has fleas. Cold fleas. Husbandrinka doesn’t know it. Well, I told him but he reacted badly, so I immediately took it back told him that I was kidding. So, now I’m in a middle of a stealth flea removal operation.

Nicki went to the vet today. We didn’t have a carrier to take her to the vet, and no one liked my idea of just putting her into a cooler, so we went and bought a cardboard one for $7. When we finished congratuating ourselves on our frugality, and stuffed Nicki into the carrier, she Houdinied out of it in approximately twelve seconds. So we had to go back and buy a $90 one. We paid cash for it so that Husbandrinka wouldn’t find the credit card receipt and we would be Suddenly Single, what with Valentine’s Day around the corner and all.

We need to put drops into Nicki’s eyes and give her medicine in her food and wash every fucking thing in the apartment. We are considering going into the witness protection program and starting fresh somewhere else. But without Husbandrinka, because he must not know about any of this. This concludes the Nicki update. We’ve had her for less than two weeks and already we are on the brink of bankruptcy and lying to everyone in sight.

The other news I have is that unfortunately I must once again revisit the comment policy because in response to my hypochondria post, Wendi and Anymommy suggested that there was a risk of cat scratch fever and the Black Death plague, respectively. They are both now banned from the blog. Look people, I am a hypochondriac. It means that you don’t suggest diseases to me. Because that’s teasing and morally wrong and Jesus hates people who do that. And so does Obama.

So Valentine’s Day is coming up. “Yay”. In celebration, I posted a big fat Valentine’s Day inspired celebrity whine over at That Other Blog.

Also, I’m taking the next couple of days off (unless something exciting happens!) but I’ll be back on Monday with a new blogging adventure that I’ll call Mortification Monday. That’s where I share humiliating episodes from my life. I predict that it will run for 2,009 consecutive Mondays.

Have a great weekend!

One year ago ...

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