I’m Right, You’re Wrong.

by Marinka on December 22, 2011

Welcome back to I’m Right, You’re Wrong, where you help resolve an issue between me and a loved one.

This week’s dilemma requires a bit of a backstory.

I’m a simple but proud person (disclaimer: I am neither simple nor proud, but I heard that referring as simple but proud to myself will endear me to readers. So.  Simple but proud, that’s me.)

Anyway. As a simple but proud person, it’s often difficult for me to ask people for things. Like, asking Kelcey to hand over children’s college fund to me so that I could get a new Mac Book — that was hard for me.  Very hard.  And I didn’t like having to ask Wendi to move into a new house that had a designated guest room for me, either.   That was no picnic for me.

But I did it. Despite my discomfort.  And my simplicity and pride.

And I’m fortunate to have friends that understand that about me.

Until I met Peajaye.

Because Peajaye is very selfish.

Oh, I’m sorry.

Peajaye is very self-centered-American.

And when I simple and proudly ask him for a tiny favor, he focuses on the inconvenience that it poses for him.  As opposed to the Greater Good.

The Situation: Marinka and Peajaye have a website devoted to Nicki and all things cat, Wanted: Cat.  One of the features on Wanted: Cat is to have new photographs of Marinka’s cat, Nicki.  Who lives in New York with Marinka.  Peajaye lives in California.  Without Marinka.

Dilemma: Whose responsibility should it be to photograph Nicki for Wanted:Cat–Peajaye’s or Marinka’s?

Disagreers: Marinka and Peajaye

Position One: I am having extreme technical difficulties that include but are not limited to: finding the camera, figuring out how to charge the camera battery, figuring out what all the camera settings are, getting Nicki and the camera in the same room, making sure I’m there too, photographing Nicki, downloading or maybe uploading photo to the computer, emailing the photo to Peajaye.

On top of all these obstacles, it makes more sense for someone who doesn’t live with Nicki to photograph her because of what is commonly known as “the fresh eye”. Or it should be known as that.   Therefore, Peajaye should photograph Nicki from now on.

Position Two:   Have you ever had a friend say, “Hey, I’m having a little party for my kid and I was wondering if I could borrow your tupperware?” – and next thing you know you’re cooking every night for three months, making calls to magicians and local bands and party rentals, followed by a day full of screaming brats in your home? And when it’s over, your friend says, “Hey, we should go into the catering business together!” And you agree? Well, that’s sorta what happened with Marinka and me.

 She had this idea of doing a picture book with her daughter about their cat, so I innocently told her about an electronic tablet that allows you to draw pictures right onto your computer. The next thing I knew, I was drawing pictures and getting “notes” from Marinka about 37 times a day. I was also checking into various ways of publishing the small tome. Her daughter was now the “consultant”  but would also take pictures of the cat, which I would then insert into my drawings.
After about three months of this fun, the book was finally completed. Yay!

But then Marinka wanted to know what my participation would be in the related website. “Website?” I asked, all stooge-y like. “Why, of course, silly,” she giggled as she twirled her golden locks. “No one does a book these days without an accompanying website. Now I know I want Nicki to do a blog on it, and—” “Uh, but Nicki’s a cat,” I innocently interrupted. Little did I know that with that statement, I’d taken the bait. Marinka started to pull me in. “Well, of course, but I’d write the posts in her voice. It’ll be fun! You could do an occasional one, if you wanted to, of course. But I’m not sure how the site should look. Any ideas? Do you think we could have pictures on it?” “Uh, maybe your kids could take pictures of Nicki? That would be easy enough of them, right? They could use their cell phones. And we could do a Nick-Pic of the week, maybe? And maybe I could do some animations. And…”

And what I could not see on the other end of the telephone line was Marinka rubbing her hands together and throwing her head back, laughing silently but maniacally. She’d caught a live one. And it was I.

And now this. Now she wants me to move to New York. From L.A. For the sole purpose of taking photos. Of her cat.
Dear reader, It’s too late for me. But not for you. If this woman asks you for your “advice,” don’t be like me. Run. Run now. Run fast. Run hard.
* * *


Well, it’s time for you to weigh in!

As usual, in an effort to reduce any inadvertent influence, I’m not going to reveal which one of us has which position.  So please, tell us who you think has the stronger point. Who is right?

One year ago ...

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{ 22 comments… read them below or add one }

December 22, 2011 at 11:06 pm

I hate it when you fight, mom & dad.


Marinka December 23, 2011 at 7:58 pm

Go to your room.


Deb Rox
December 22, 2011 at 11:27 pm

I really don’t trust Position Two for a few reasons. First, Marinka doesn’t giggle. So that makes 2’s reporting particularly non-credible. There are more reasons but I’m too tired to list them and I don’t know how to make bullet points in a comment box. Is it even possible to put a bulleted list in a comment? Could you ask Peajaye to see if we can get some bullet functionality up in here? It’s about time.


Marinka December 23, 2011 at 7:59 pm

You’d think he would get the hint. ::shaking head sadly but wisely::


ladyday December 23, 2011 at 12:45 am

Get the kid, erm I mean “consultant”, to take and upload the kitty pics. Children are very techno savvy. It’s so annoying.


Tinne from Tantrums and Tomatoes December 23, 2011 at 7:35 am

Let’s get this straight, you have both worked on a book devoted to Nicky, you have both put tremendous effort into making a website for Nicky, someone takes pictures of Nicky. All this centers around Nicky and Nicky just lies there looking cute the whole day? Sounds to me like that feline has you both rrrriiiiiggghhht where he wants you….


December 23, 2011 at 9:40 am

I plan on commenting on this, but I’m Craig’s List right now, looking an NYC apartment and some new photo gear.


Megan December 23, 2011 at 9:52 am

Well… some people are just ungrateful, aren’t they?

No, I’m not going to tell you who.


Math Geek December 23, 2011 at 11:04 am

You are obviously on vacation (with Gary?) because you are thinking too small. Pic of the week! Ha. Why don’t you have a live camera feed!?

And of course you need to have a tiny camera ON Nicki so people can have the feline-cam view! 24/7/52 – oh to “live” Nicki’s life in such visual detail!


Marinka December 23, 2011 at 8:00 pm

OMG, who’s Gary?!


anymommy December 26, 2011 at 12:24 am

That was my question! And where’s Husbandrinka? And why can’t HE take pictures of Nicki?


Math Geek December 27, 2011 at 11:26 am

Ummm sorry. 🙂


The weather during Gary’s vacation was strange. It rained on 15 different days, but it never rained the whole day……


December 23, 2011 at 11:47 am

Ummmmm, no comment.


Sandi December 23, 2011 at 12:26 pm

Math Geek is spot on with the cat cam! We NEED that. Now.


dusty earth mother December 23, 2011 at 2:04 pm

Why doesn’t Nicki move to California?


Marinka December 23, 2011 at 8:01 pm

Nicki is a New Yorker.


calitonyc December 23, 2011 at 2:10 pm

New York is better than California so position one is the correct one.


The mama bird diaries December 25, 2011 at 2:18 pm

When do you upload vs download?! Obviously it’s ridiculous for Marinka to be saddled with the responsibility of photographing nicki. Oh and I know I said I would transfer all that money to you but I just realized we dont have college funds.


Anna Lefler
December 25, 2011 at 4:55 pm

“Self-centered American.”






awesome dude December 26, 2011 at 10:53 am

Too many letters…You have too much time on your hands. Come back and cook something already.


ester December 26, 2011 at 10:50 pm

Goodness! I tried running more than one blog and it drove me nuts. I’d say give up Nicki’s blog, but my husband also calls me a “dream-crusher,” so clearly I am a horrible advisor. Poor Pea – you should have all the control here -you’re the gay aren’t you? Work your magic!!


joeinvegas December 27, 2011 at 1:18 pm

Whoever lives with the cat should take the photos. Daily (what’s this pic of the week stuff?)


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