Mystery

by Marinka on December 14, 2011

One of the ongoing mysteries of my life is why my son cannot place trash into the trash can.

This is sequel Mystery of Why The Laundry Does Not Get Placed Into the Hamper and is being sold with Why The Dirty Dishes Relax In the Sink as Opposed to The Say, Oh, I Don’t Know, The Dishwasher.

It’s a mystery that can keep me up at night.  A mental page-turner, if you will.

So as I was saying good night to Young Ladrinka last week, I spotted this candy wrapper and snapped a picture. And then I had to turn the light back on to get a clearer shot and he asked me what I was doing.

So close and yet so insanely far omfg, why can't it just go into the trash?!

 

“I’m gathering photographic evidence,” I explained.  Because he has the right to know.

“You’re going to put it on Twitter or on your blog, right?” he asked. “Because you think then I’ll feel embarrassed and pick it up.”

“Why would you be embarrassed?”

“Because you’ll be like ooh, look, other moms! My son’s candy wrapper! And they’ll be oh, ha ha, my son does that too!”

“So maybe you should pick it up then, in order to prevent the humiliation.”

“Whatever.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means I don’t care what you post on your blog, I’m not going to read it.”

I may have to rent a billboard.

One year ago ...

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{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }

highlyirritable
Twitter:
December 14, 2011 at 2:23 pm

Sometimes when one of my kids does something stupid or amusing, the other one says in a sing-songy voice, “Blog Fodddddder….”

Let me know when you find a tactic that works, because according to my kids, online shaming is *so* 2004.

Reply

Ilana
Twitter:
December 14, 2011 at 3:11 pm

Uh-oh. The written word isn’t working. You may need to post a picture of him so that we can all shout at Young Ladrinka on the street. “WHY CAN’T YOU JUST GET IT IN THE TRASH?!”

Reply

CuppaJo December 14, 2011 at 3:46 pm

My HUSBAND puts laundry on the LID of the hamper, it drives me absolutely batshitinsane. And when I caught my 6yo daughter doing it the other day, she explained that it was “because I want to be like daddy.” I almost exploded.

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Tracie
Twitter:
December 14, 2011 at 6:14 pm

Right now there is a wrapper on our floor, by the trashcan, that I am refusing to pick up….it is my husband’s.

So close.

Reply

dusty earth mother December 14, 2011 at 6:31 pm

Jam it in his gum cup and make him wear it as a festive hat. Then we’ll see who’s so laid back.

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Stasha
Twitter:
December 14, 2011 at 10:46 pm

I think it is time to tell him that baseball scouts read your blog.

Reply

sharon December 15, 2011 at 1:16 am

hahaha so funny

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Rainyday December 15, 2011 at 6:35 am

I leave my trash on the kitchen counter, instead of opening the cupboard door and lifting the lid to the garbage. Once the pile is big enough, I do it all in one trip. Dives my husband craaaaazy! I just don’t like touching the garbage/washing my hands repeatedly.

Reply

Tinne from Tantrums and Tomatoes December 15, 2011 at 7:26 am

Oh, Lord this is my future isn’t it? Several years from now I’ll be having this exact same conversation with my daughters. Better stock up on liquor.

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Wendy December 15, 2011 at 8:01 am

Oh this reminds me of this summer when I kept a countdown of how many days a certain somebody’s sock stayed on the stairwell…I posted it on my site and we all placed bets.

We’re moms we need all the cheap entertainment we can get!

Reply

awesome dude December 15, 2011 at 10:36 am

Contributing to the matter of the development of the self centered future male chauvinist pig.

Mama bought brownie yesterday to be shared with him, his sister and herself.

He demanded to use a ruler to make sure that he will not be shortchanged.

Reply

Katie December 15, 2011 at 12:08 pm

Don’t the trash fairies come around and pick that stuff up?

Reply

Marta
Twitter:
December 15, 2011 at 6:49 pm

We have the same problem in our house or worse this:

https://twitter.com/#!/marta28/status/146774248973799424

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tracey - Justanothermommy December 15, 2011 at 9:50 pm

How about we all make fun of him instead? What’s his facebook name? I’ll totally start calling him Trash Boy for you.

Reply

alaina
Twitter:
December 16, 2011 at 12:06 pm

My husband does the ole “put the dish on the counter above the dishwasher instead of IN the dishwasher”. I hate that it bothers me more than him. Bastard.

Reply

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