Today is a guest post from my IRL BFF. And no, you can’t steal her from me.
One of my daughters is a high school junior and has a friend who very recently came out to his parents as gay. Josh comes from a good family, and he’s a good kid: Well-mannered, well-dressed, nice looking, academically advanced, and just plain nice. He is truly everything a parent could hope for in a child.
He and his family are lifelong members of a large local Baptist church. A lot of kids at the high school go to that church. For that matter, so do a lot of the teachers. And the principal.
Josh’s parents love him very much. He’s been a blessing to them all his life. He’s such a great kid and all. And when he told them he was gay, they didn’t stop loving him one tiny bit. But they stopped accepting him.
[Wait! I just need to set a scene for you here. I live in extremely conservative, extremely Christian, small-town South Carolina (unofficial state motto: South Carolina – First in Fat, Last in Education). Social change comes slowly and reluctantly here in the state where you can find the famous Redneck Store, which is the go-to place for all your KKK memorabilia and Neo-Nazi bumper sticker needs.]
Back to Josh. After he told his parents, his mother cried. A lot. They arranged for him to meet with Zach, the youth pastor at their church. Zach is a young married father who also coaches the church basketball team. He’s cool! He was nice when he talked to Josh, sympathetic even. But he told Josh that being gay is a sin.
Since Josh was still gay after his talk with Zach, his parents took him to a therapist, a Christian therapist, of course. During the course of their session, the therapist used the word “pervert,” and things went downhill from there. You may not be surprised to learn that when Josh left the therapist’s office, he was still gay.
His parents’ next plan was to send him to Truth Ministry, an organization which serves North and South Carolina. Their tagline: Freedom from Homosexuality through Jesus Christ. Yes, they pray away the gay. This is where Josh drew the line, however, and refused to go. His parents’ response? They took away his car. Because as you know, lack of transportation is the best route to heterosexuality.
As Josh and his family continue their struggle to come to terms with this change in their family dynamic, I have strong optimism that they’ll work things out. And by “work things out” I definitely mean that his parents will become educated enough to realize that Josh is not broken and doesn’t need to be fixed. In the meantime, though, I’d love to offer them this deal: I’ll take your “Oh poor me, my fabulous honor student child is gay and wants nothing more than my love and acceptance” problem, and in return you can have my “She’s been sexually active since age 12, high school dropping out, cutting, overdosing, jobless, homeless, unwanted pregnancy having, $150,000 spent on therapy and treatment centers and blames-all-her-unhappiness-on-me” problem.
You don’t want to trade? Didn’t think so.
One year ago ...
- Massacre - 2011