From the category archives:



by Marinka on May 25, 2017

Here is a list of problems that you will encounter when you decide to blog after a long absence from blogging:

1. You will find out that your domain name has expired. This will be a fine how-do-you-do, and you will wonder how this could have happened. Then you’ll remember that you got your domain name through Go Daddy and the many, many emails that have come addressed to you with dire warnings from Go Daddy, but that when you saw them, you thought that you are a feminist and Go Daddy had a sexist commercial at the Super Bowl half time show a few years back and the term “Daddy” is kind of porny and you will express your displeasure at all things patriarchal by not reading the email, because if there’s a way to create a better world for our children, it’s to mark email as Spam.

2. There will be a not-too-brief intermission during which you will try to figure out how to log into your Go Daddy account to renew the domain name. You will accidentally renew a wrong domain name. Then the right one. Then you re-renew it again for a few hundred thousand years because you never want to have this experience again.

3. Only a complete idiot would be surprised to learn that you do not remember your blog password when you try to log into your blog. A mere decade or so later, you reset everything, hit “REMEMBER PASSWORD ON THIS COMPUTER” with emphasis and you’re ready to roll.

4. You will become a person who says “ready to roll” for no apparent reason.

5. Your kids will ask you why it’s ok for you to say “Fuck all this shit and the horse it rode on!” but yet when they say “Gosh darn it!” you raise a perfectly arched eyebrow.

6. You will re-read #5 on your list of problems that you will encounter when you decide to blog after a long absence from blogging and realize that you are now a person who makes up lies in blog posts.

7. Then you will realize that in a country that elected that lying monstrosity as president, making up lies in a blog post doesn’t even warrant a mention, although now you’re worried that you won’t stop mentioning it.

8. You will wonder if you can get through a whole post without writing about your absolute dismay at what is happening in America now and how you cannot believe that anyone voted for this, even though you know and love people who voted for exactly this. There are asterisks all over that sentence but you can’t remember how to insert them.

9. You won’t be able to decide what to blog about first: how your life has changed in the past few years, how great your kids are, how hard it is not to kill the cats, how you turned 50 even though you don’t feel a day over 70, the ballet you saw the other day. And then you’ll think that maybe this list post is enough. To break the ice.

10. You will remember that lists have ten items.

11. You will be an overachiever by adding the eleventh item to the list.

12. You will remember to thank people for reading.



by Marinka on July 2, 2014

I know I’ve been updating less than usual for a while and it’s taking its toll on me too. Obviously the fact that I decided not to write about my divorce is a factor (although please rest assured, it’s all very boring and amicable, no War of the Roses here. Not even War of the Carnations, so you’re not missing anything) but so is the new sense that I have to write profound things.

And I have no idea where that sense about writing profound things came from, although I’m starting to suspect a chemical imbalance/tumor situation. Obviously I hope not because that’s pretty much the last thing I need right now (well, after a French manicure) but I can’t explain it.

But if I’m not writing profound stuff, then this is what I’m writing:

1. My son turned 13 in June, which is completely crazy to me. I’m not one of those people who gets all “where did the time go?” (mostly because I have a calendar) but still, 13 is a big one. And spoiler alert: My daughter is about to turn 16 any day now which, and I’m not mathematician, is even bigger than 13. Good thing that I, myself, am holding steady at 25.

2. The other day Mama, who was at my apartment, called me all alarmed because she found “A lot of cash” in one of the kids’ room. “Where did all this cash come from?” she wanted to know. Now I don’t know what you imagine when you get such a phone call, but I immediately pictured a suitcase packed with hundred dollar bills, unmarked, preferably. And I started thinking about how I would spend it all, under the guardianship theory loosely translated as “all your shit is mine.” I was mid-way through shopping list 2.4, when I thought to ask for a rough estimate of the cash involved and learned that it was $12. Obviously I’m devastated that my kids are running a really low-profit meth lab.

3. I’ve had a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup every day this week. Mostly because they’re so delicious.
And then this happened:Screen Shot 2014-06-27 at 9.14.28 AM

4. I am lucky to have a lot of love in my life. I’ve always been lucky, but I’m feeling a bit luckier now. It’s one of those things that I’m hesitant to write about because I’m afraid of jinxing it (and because I’m a lady) but let me say this and let you read between the lines. I recently had a weekend that I wish on absolutely everyone that I love. There was so much love and laughter that my stomach hurt. Literally hurt, like some kind of an ab workout. And even though I don’t have abs of steel as a result, my stomach now has laugh lines. I’ll take it.

I am going to figure out how to continue to write this blog during this new phase of my life. It’s trickier, of course, but I miss the daily writing. Who knows. Maybe it’ll even be something profound.


No Comment

May 26, 2014

It took me a while, but finally I realized that the comments section on this blog is broken. At first when I saw zero comments on post after post I thought, “huh, no one is commenting!” and while that would make some bloggers despondent, I just took it to mean that everyone agreed with my […]

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April 10, 2014

If it’s true that it’s better to be lucky than smart, then I have it made. Because when the trailer for the American Blogger documentary came out earlier this week, I had friends who contacted me to spoof it. And I’m smart enough to jump on it. Enjoy: Thanks to Neil, who always has the […]

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Better Red Than Not Talking About Heart Disease

February 13, 2014

Today is your lucky day, because today you get two posts for the price of one. First, I will tell you about a situation with my kids. And then, I will probably save your life. *** This week I received a gift. Actually it was a many gifts, and it arrived from Tieks, the people […]

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I’m Right, You’re Wrong: XOXO

January 25, 2014

It’s finally time for another installment of I’m Right, You’re Wrong, where I use the internet to work out disputes with loved ones. Because I can’t get on the Jerry Springer Show. The rules are that I will present you with a dispute, but anonymously, so as not to influence you to agree with my […]

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October 3, 2013

Last week, I went to L.A. to visit my friend Peajaye. I met him through my other friend Wendi, when she and I guest posted on each other’s blogs back in the good old days when people did that. Anyway, Peajaye and I have been friends since 2008 (which sounds ancient), so I wanted to […]

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A Rose by Any Other Name is Still Overpriced

August 28, 2013

I changed my blog name this week and no one got me a gift or anything. I blame Miley Cyrus. It’s now Marinka NYC instead of Motherhood in NYC. I’ve been thinking about it for a while. For one, as my kids get older, they don’t love my blogging about them. And for another, I’m […]

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