From the monthly archives:

August 2013

My husband is a great guy and everything, but he and I don’t see eye to eye on some things. And Nicki’s welfare is one of those things.

Here is a recent photo of Nicki, so feel free to gaze into her eyes and fall head over tail in love before you proceed with the rest of the post.


So when it comes to Nicki’s health and well-being, my husband is very much aligned with the “let sleeping cats lie” theory of veterinary medicine whereas I am mildly more every day is an opportunity to be diagnosed with a new disease, let’s not waste it! camp about it and insist on regular checkups and access to Plan B for our beloved Nicki. (Incidentally, what’s Plan A? Condoms? Maybe condoms should rebrand as Plan A. Just an idea.)

“She looks completely fine,” he says every time I mention that Nicki has another wellcat visit coming up. “It’s not necessary to spend hundreds of dollars on a check up.”

I’m never convinced by these visual reassurances.

What if Nicki has some kind of Silent Killer condition, like high blood pressure or diabetes? What if she is depressed? As her guardians we need to be on top of that stuff so that she doesn’t turn to drugs or French manicures.

“You can’t tell by looking,” I mumble, as I flip through the Directory of Feline Specialists. Does she need a cardiologist, maybe? A pulmonary specialist?

“Of course you can tell by looking,” he says, disgusted by my humanitarian agenda. “Nicki looks healthy. Sly doesn’t.”

Sly, incidentally, is my parents’ cat. Or was, until he decided to die shortly before Mama and my daughter left on their summer sojourn to Scandinavia and Russia and the funeral had to be put on hold. And by “on hold” I mean that Sly is currently in my parents’ freezer.

Actually I have no idea if Sly looks healthy or not. At least he’s staying cool during this terrible heat wave.

But I made an appointment for Nicki to see the vet and my kids and Mama took her (and a pre-signed check) earlier this week.

“Everything is fine!” Mama said.”Nicki gained half a pound, but that’s not as much as you did!”

She sounded downright jovial.

I decided to get the full report from my 12 year old son.

“The doctor said that Nicki is round,” he told me.

“Round?” I asked.

“Round,” he repeated.

That was all the confirmation I needed.

“Nicki is suffering from the Round,” I told my husband.

“I have no idea what that means,” he hid his despair well.

“I’m not sure either,” I confessed, “but I think we both know that it will require further testing and perhaps a second opinion.”

My husband didn’t respond. Probably because he was deep in thought. I’m guessing about the best way to thank me for staying on top of Nicki’s medical needs.

I’ll keep you posted on the roundness. You can’t be too careful with these things.


A Rose by Any Other Name is Still Overpriced

by Marinka on August 28, 2013

I changed my blog name this week and no one got me a gift or anything. I blame Miley Cyrus.

It’s now Marinka NYC instead of Motherhood in NYC. I’ve been thinking about it for a while. For one, as my kids get older, they don’t love my blogging about them. And for another, I’m such an egomaniac, why shouldn’t I get more play in the header? And for a third, I’m hoping this will reduce the number of “Dear Mommyblogger” PR pitches that I receive. I mean, I know these people have a job to do, but unless they’re offering an evening with Ryan Gosling, I’m not interested.

What I am interested in knowing is why people sign their emails. I’m not Sherlock Holmes or anything but generally when I receive an email I can figure out who it’s from. There are clues, you know. Like the email address. Or the fact that the person is a friend. Or a “friend”. And then, while I was wondering this, I got an email from someone who reads this blog and she asked me a question and after I responded, I signed it with my name.

I forgave myself because it was my first exchange with this particular person, but slippery slope, right?


Texts From a Marriage

August 23, 2013

Me: Where are we on the Basset Hound puppy situation? Husband: I don’t even begin to know what you’re talking about. Me: I’d like to have a Basset Hound puppy. I had a Basset growing up. And then as a grown up. You loved Mavis too, right? Husband: Mavis was a good dog. Me: So, […]

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I’m Right, You’re Wrong: The AA Version

August 21, 2013

No, I’m not in AA, although please keep checking this post for updates, depending on how things are going. Recently, my “friend” Peajaye and I were having a loving conversation about people we know in AA and how they acknowledge the time that they have been sober. Specifically, is it a birthday or an anniversary? […]

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Yes, Sting, the Russians Love Their Children Too. Even When They Pull Shit Like This

August 19, 2013

12 year old son: Why did the chicken cross the road? 46 year old me: Why? Son: To get to the mean witch’s house. Me: Ok. Son: Knock, knock. Me: Who’s there? Son: The chicken. Da’yum, mom. #OMG

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Russian and Jewish and American, oh MY!

August 18, 2013

One of the greatest things about blogging, besides the whole fame and fortune thing, is the people I’ve met. Except for you, weirdo. Like Alina Adams, who is a Soviet immigrant (like me), lives in NYC (like me) and is a New York Times bestselling author (unlike me.) Even though I only met Alina in […]

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August 16, 2013

There are many ways in which I’ve been lucky (this is where I pause to spit three times over my right shoulder, the Russian way of warding off bad luck and the jinx, and if you know anything about Russians it’s probably what fantastic luck they have, what with Stalin and the labor death camps […]

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Emails from Mama

August 13, 2013

This year, for Mama’s birthday, Papa bought her a tablet. It was a bold move, considering that Mama is a proud luddite, still hasn’t mastered the cell phone and I suspect hopes that the internet is a phase. I’ve never seen Mama use the computer, and any time I’ve responded to one of her questions […]

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