Sunday is My Fun Day. I Mean, “Fun” Day.

by Marinka on October 19, 2009

Do you ever have one of those days when you wake up and think, “Dear Lord, please take me painlessly and quickly or as a back up plan, at least let me stay in bed all day and eat M&Ms”?

That was my Sunday morning last weekend, except instead of a quick death and/or M&M consumption, Husbandrinka went to the lake house in New Jersey and I had to do the laundry and then reward myself by taking SIX CHILDREN, four of which were in no way related to me, to the movies.

I didn’t mind Husbandrinka going away, because we were mid-fight and I find it a lot easier to give him the silent treatment when he’s not near me, provoking conversation. Because I’m chatty.

But the whole laundry thing is totally draining because I still do not understand how in this lousy economy we have the only cleaning lady who refuses to do laundry.

Ok, so I’m doing the laundry, and I even mastermanipulated my son into helping me.  Of course the help consisted of his putting a pair of socks in and then delivering a soliloquy about how he doesn’t think that he should be the one doing this, since it’s Sunday and that is the day that he has set aside for rest, as opposed to rest of the week, which he has set aside for working in the mines, apparently.

And then I get the brilliant idea to call some of my friends and offer my kids for the afternoon.  You know, for fun.  But somehow they all see it coming and using reverse psychology and Jedi mind tricks I end up with their kids instead.

So suddenly, I am Octomom, except with six kids, which sort of makes me Sexomom, but that sounds disgusting.  And of course the only movie theatre that is showing Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs is Not Close To Me, and a secondaryof course, because we are more than four people we can’t go in a cab.  Because there is a four person maximum and you can’t put kids in the trunk.

I have this problem solved, and decide to take the subway and slide my metrocard through and let the pipsqueaks pass at a rate of $2.25 each, but who’s counting.  So when four of them are on the subway side of the turnstile and I am on the other side, my Metrocard reads “maximum number of fares exceeded”  which totally doesn’t make sense.  Because if I have enough money on my Metrocard, why can’t I swipe it as many times as I like?  If I want to treat the entire borough of Manhattan to a  subway ride, and I have the money on my Metrocard, what’s to stop me?  Well, beside the NYC subway system, I mean.

So I go to get a new Metrcard, because it’s a good investment.  And before I go, I tell the kids to STAY STILL which seems to be code for “play hide-n-seek” on the subway platform.

Which is fun and all, but I am already in pre-nervous breakdown state and it’s really not going to take a lot to tip me over. Like a missing kid or two should totally do it.

One year ago ...

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{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }

anna see October 19, 2009 at 6:28 pm

Sounds like the kind of fun I don’t want to have on a Sunday. I’d definitely take the M&M’s instead. You should have seen me with 2 kids on the metro going to the Jonas Brothers concert. I was sweating and flipping out. 6? Bless your heart– you were almost a Duggar.

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Marinka October 20, 2009 at 12:42 am

I am an honorary Duggar. I just need the haircut.

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the mama bird diaries
Twitter:
October 19, 2009 at 10:56 pm

Did that just say “Sharing is Sexy?”

Have you every considered renting a movie and making popcorn?

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Marinka October 20, 2009 at 12:43 am

And have all six kids at my house? No, I never considered that. Why?

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Kirsten October 19, 2009 at 10:58 pm

I think you should apply for sainthood for taking six kids on your own to the movies. Either that or the loony bin.

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Marinka October 20, 2009 at 12:42 am

My application is pending. To both.

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Laura October 20, 2009 at 8:07 am

The moment of them being stuck on the other side of the turn style would have done me in for the day! That is why I utterly hate the subway. That and the rats. Either one- your pick.

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traci October 20, 2009 at 8:49 am

Ahh-were you that nutty lady that let her baby carriage fall in front of the oncoming train?

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Vicki
Twitter:
October 20, 2009 at 9:10 am

I would just take the fare money out of your children’s college fund. That way next time they can carefully weigh the consequences of having friends over for movies and a four-year education that will plant them solidly on a career path of their choosing.

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CSY October 20, 2009 at 9:31 am

Oh bless your heart! There is NO way i’d take my 3 by myself…much less 6! You’re a saint!

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Maureen@IslandRoar October 20, 2009 at 12:33 pm

Ah, the subway with children; what could be more fun?

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Jeanne October 20, 2009 at 5:50 pm

I don’t know — sounds like losing a kid or two would be a step in the right direction.

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jeanie October 20, 2009 at 10:13 pm

If it was the right combination of kids, it would totally get your friends over that whole “reverse psychology and Jedi mind tricks” thing they have going.

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Marie
Twitter:
October 22, 2009 at 10:28 pm

Not only are you brave, but incredibly generous. None of the other parents even offered to go with you?! That is just so wrong.

I grew up in New York. When I was a kid, my aunt, then in her 20’s, took myself, my brother and my two cousins everywhere in the city. She was like Mary Poppins and we always had a blast. She was young and strong and adept at wrangling the four of us, three boys and a girl, all over. She had us the day that Jack Kennedy came careening down the street in an open convertible during the presidential campaign of 1960, followed by a stampede of hysterical worshipers. With quick thinking she corralled us into the space before the door of a storefront , saving us all from being trampled.

But she was defeated one day on the subway by my cousin. He wasn’t fast enough as she hustled us through the open doors. When she turned, expecting him to be behind her, she instead saw the subway car doors close on his shocked ten year old face. Then he grinned and waved wildly as our train pulled away, leaving him alone on the platform in Times Square.

We got off and backtracked at the next stop, finding him unscathed by his Great Adventure.

But my aunt has never been the same. lol

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mommygeekology
Twitter:
October 24, 2009 at 9:46 am

I would have lifted those buggers over and told the security team to fuck off. Good lord. 🙂

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