A friend of mine had this conversation with a male member of her household this morning.
Friend (dashing, svelte, in her early 40s, but doesn’t look a nanosecond older than 38 and a half): NameRedacted, could you please come here.
NameRedacted: Where? Are you in the bathroom? Why? Am I in trouble?
Friend (Practically a model): A wee bit of trouble. Bring some paper towels.
NameRedacted: What?! Can you not say that so loud, PLEASE? YOU ARE EMBARRASSING ME!
NameRedacted arrives at bathroom door.
Friend (Also, a heart of gold): Please wipe down the toilet seat.
NameRedacted: I don’t like doing that!
Friend (And don’t get me started on her intellect!): And I don’t like sitting down in urine.
NameRedacted: Why would you sit down?
Friend (The complete package! Uncanny!): Because I’m a girl and I don’t have a penis.
NameRedacted: [Familiar relationship redacted]! Stop saying penis.
Friend (but still a mere mortal): Maybe we can make a deal. You lift the seat up and I will never say PENIS again.
One year ago ...
- 2013 Reading List - 2013