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by Marinka on July 11, 2012

Young Ladrinka and I had a splendid Sunday planned last weekend, centered around the fact that we were heading to CitiField to watch our beloved Mets play.

But before we headed out to the stadium, Young Ladrinka shared with me that he knows that Husbandrinka and I love our daughter more, and that he is a distant second and that usually he is ok with that state of events, but that particular morning it was hard for him to take.

He had a good point, of course, because this was brought on by the fact that he and I were at a local grocery store and I, already holding 2 pounds of stewing beef and a package of mushrooms, asked him if he’d mind getting some carrots and holding on to them until we got ready to pay.

Well.

It turns out that he did mind, very much so, because he is exhausted from having to hold all things all the time and not only that, but according to him, I’ve never, not once, asked my daughter to hold anything, she’s practically Venus de Milo (you know, without arms) while he is trapped in a Myth of Sisyphus, having to haul a boulder up a hill in perpetuity, except in this case, hauling boulder = holding a 12 ounce bag of baby carrots.

I was momentarily stunned by his accusation and explanation, which gave him time to advance his argument by suggesting that we only had him because our daughter was so perfect we wanted another one just like her and then we were disappointed by him and that’s why we stopped having kids. As soon as he said it, he seemed a little stunned himself, like he couldn’t believe that he actually came up with something like that, but then he dug in.

Yes, he demanded to know, why did we stop having children RIGHT AFTER HE WAS BORN? Did we think that he wouldn’t notice the “coincidental” timing? Perhaps we thought he was stupid in addition to being not favorite?

So he had me. He ran circles around me logically, and I had to concede that I failed him as a mother and the world as a human being. That, or I had a discussion with him that ran so long that we were almost late to see our beloved Mets. They’re our favorite, you know. That’s why we never ask them to hold a bag of baby carrots.

One year ago ...

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{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }

ChiTown Girl July 11, 2012 at 8:32 am

I’m surprised you didn’t turn it around and tell him he screwed up the first time, and you weren’t happy with the results, so you had him. When you saw that he was absolutely perfect, you decided to stop, because you knew you could never repeat such perfection!

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ChiTown Girl July 11, 2012 at 8:33 am

*That was supposed to say “YOU screwed up the first time…” not he.

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Hope July 11, 2012 at 9:47 am

I can see his point. If you really loved him, you’ve picked up a basket at the front door so you could carry everything.

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anna see July 11, 2012 at 9:48 am

very generous of you to take your non-fave to a baseball game!
btw, i told my mother she must have hated my name, or she would have used it on an earlier child.

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Catherine Dabels
Twitter:
July 11, 2012 at 10:12 am

So does this mean you are going to give him a baby brother? To prove that it’s possible to have someone less favourite than him?

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Tinne from Tantrums and Tomatoes July 11, 2012 at 10:28 am

For a young boy a 12 ounce bag of baby carrots is a heavy burden indeed.

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Megan July 11, 2012 at 10:55 am

I sincerely hope that you wholeheartedly agreed with him and then sighed in relief that you no longer have to hide your real feelings.

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Awesome Dude July 11, 2012 at 11:15 am

Knowing him as I hopefully do, he was simple looking for the “king’s ransom”.

Since his birth day just passed a few days ago

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Mom of A and a July 11, 2012 at 12:00 pm

Such vision! Such genius! And, you say he’s your least favorite?! Pshaw!!!

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Meredith L.
Twitter:
July 11, 2012 at 12:45 pm

My parents clearly favored my little brother, as evidenced by the fact that they bought him a TV for his room and never bought me one. Also: sexism.

We plan to make our two kids fight for favorite status. We think it’s more fair that way.

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hokgardner
Twitter:
July 11, 2012 at 12:47 pm

Sounds familiar. My big three all assume that I love one of the others best. The littlest just assumes I love her most because she’s three, and that’s how three-year-olds think.

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Olga
Twitter:
July 11, 2012 at 2:41 pm

Holding 12 ounce bag of baby carrots? CPS beware! What’s next? Emptying the dishwasher???

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Elyse July 11, 2012 at 2:48 pm

Such audacity, you have!

I’m new to your blog [and the blogging world in general, having just started my own a month ago]. Thanks for keeping me laughing! I so look forward to reading your posts each day.

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Steph July 11, 2012 at 10:48 pm

omigoodness, i’m so relieved to hear that my children aren’t the only ones who believe they are put upon when asked to do the slightest task.

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kimberly July 12, 2012 at 1:23 am

You can tell him he’s my favorite.

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Mexmom July 12, 2012 at 9:22 am

Can’t believe you made him carry a bag of carrots, clearly he is not your favorite since everyone knows that is worse than chils labor in third world countries.

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Polish Mama on the Prairie
Twitter:
July 12, 2012 at 9:41 am

This carrot bag is training for him as a warrior when he grows up, doesn’t he know? 40-lb. bag uphill in rain because… well, I’m not sure why but people apparently do that. Just not me, a Venus de Milo first born daughter that I am as well like your daughter.

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dusty earth mother July 12, 2012 at 8:37 pm

Doesn’t he know that Mets spring training starts with baby carrot tosses? He’ll never make the Bigs with that attitude.

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the mama bird diaries
Twitter:
July 13, 2012 at 12:37 am

Those baby carrots are enormously heavy. Your poor son.

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GrandeMocha
Twitter:
July 14, 2012 at 4:24 pm

Tell him that he is your favorite because he always holds stuff for you.

Reply

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