I am being punished.
Because last week I mocked the leg pit and this weekend I was in agony with the back of my knee being very hurty. So hurty, in fact, that I couldn’t unbend it. And it’s hard to walk without straightening your legs, although it’s really easy to propose to people. (And if you’re wondering, yes, I did try walking like a mummy with my arms outstretched and my legs extended, wobbling from side to side. Of course I did. At the supermarket on Sunday afternoon. It’s amazing how shrieky other people’s children are.)
Life is so weird. One day you’re just vaguely aware of the back of the knee and the next day it’s trying to kill you.
Which brings me to my question: Do you think your ass muscles are connected to your knee ..muscles? Ligaments? Pits?
Because I also have pain in my, shall we call it, gluteus-extremely-maximus, and it seems to radiate to my knee.
“I’m pretty sure I’m dying,” I told Husbandrinka. That poor man. How he’ll rebuild his life without me, I don’t know.
“Does this hurt?” he asked, tapping me on my knee. I really don’t see this as the time to test my reflexes, but I kicked him just in case. No need to have him worried about reflexology in top of everything else.
“No, it doesn’t hurt,” I told him, putting on a brave face. The brave face that was sipping a Chardonnay.
“So just take an anti-inflammatory,” he told me.
It’s like he’s some kind of an inflammatory pusher.
Mama was less sympathetic. “You need to lose weight,” she told me. “You have knees for human, not for elephant.”
I’m pretty sure this is the end for me.
The knee is the new Achilles’ Heel.
One year ago ...
- Fashion Plate - 2009