Last Week

by Marinka on February 23, 2012

There are many things that I want to tell you, bits and pieces, and I’m combining them all in one jumbo post. For absolutely no extra charge. Just because you’re so adorable.

I had an interesting week. I wrote a post about how challenged I feel as a mom of a teenage daughter. I cried a little. And I am so grateful for all the supportive comments.

I also had some great news. My teenage daughter was accepted into two high schools that I absolutely love, and I am so, so proud of her. And of me. Because I was really worried that I’d fucked up the admissions process by doing something wrong. So, relief. And happiness. (These are the private schools, so please send a lot of cash or cash substitutes. We hear from public schools at the end of the month, so I still have a fair deal of anxiety, but at least now I know that she has been accepted to a high school that we all like and that I won’t be forced to homeschool her/force her into show business.)

And then there was the day that I woke up enraged. Because I had a dream that Husbandrinka was having an affair. And when I dream-confronted him, he told me that he still wanted to be friends with me.

I was seething. And he said “how many times are you going to have this dream?” which is typical deflecting. But as I was about to point that out, I realized that Dream Husbandrinka wasn’t my real Husbandrinka, it was some other guy. Hmm. But I decided not to tell him in case he’s one of those lunatics that holds Dream Grudges.

Young Ladrinka was drafted into a baseball division that has a very exciting title. For people who follow baseball for children in a non-weird way, that is. He was nervous about trying out for it, and we encouraged him and he made it.

I warned Mama that we would tell them at dinner and that it was Important so to make Noises of Delight and Pride. And she did. Wow, she said, this is wonderful news. Unfortunately I didn’t warn Papa, so made Noises of Confusion. What does this mean? he asked, probably more puzzled by Mama’s Delight and Pride.

But high school, baseball, kids, grandparents. I write about it, and I complain sometimes, but I know I’m lucky to have this life and I’m very, very grateful.

And to end on a non-wrist-slashy note, yesterday Young Ladrinka told me that he and Mama went to Petco to pass some time while Teenage Daughter was at karate. They saw a few Nickis in the Adopt Us! area and they also saw a cat whose cage card announced that his name was Chuck.

“So, Mom, this guy comes by and says, Chuck? He looks like Chucky! And then he took a pen and added a ‘Y’!”
“Did this man work there?”
“Was it a kid?”
“Why would an adult change a cat’s name?”
“Mama, is this all true?”
“Yes. Many crazy people around. That is why children shouldn’t be unattended.”

It was certainly a close call. I’d hate Young Ladrinka to have come home as Young Ladrinkay.

One year ago ...

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{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }

Loukia February 23, 2012 at 7:43 am

I can’t imagine the stress of having to wait to hear if you’re accepted to school, especially a public one! Good Luck with your (hers?) decision!


b a seagull
February 23, 2012 at 9:50 am

Congratulations to lovely teen age daughter and family. It’s not an easy task in this city. We went through it four times.

(you always sound grateful, even if you are kvetching a little)


meekasmommy February 23, 2012 at 9:53 am

Congrats on all the good stuff! And, you know, on the avoidance of dream grudges (because ain’t nothing worse than that)!


ladyday February 23, 2012 at 10:24 am

Mazel tov on both kids accomplishments!


February 23, 2012 at 10:29 am

Sounds like a great week. Great news all around. Go Marinkay!


February 24, 2012 at 7:46 am

Oh no! “Marinkay” is way close to one door-to-door cosmetic brand. Now I have a vision of her selling me lotions I don’t need. Thank you. No, really I don’t need any makeup either! **Shuts the door


Mo February 23, 2012 at 10:51 am

It’s unfortunate that you can’t tell a dream-grudge-lunatic simply by looking at them.

You can, however, trick them into revealing themselves.

“Husbandrinka, I had a dream where you threw my cat out of the window.”

Watch and learn from his reaction. And if he then throws your cat out the window you at least know he is a dream-replicator-lunatic.


anymommy February 23, 2012 at 12:58 pm

Congratulations on your fabulous kids. Makes sense they would be amazing like you. (That is my sucking up for the month, but I mean it 😉


February 23, 2012 at 1:22 pm



Deb February 23, 2012 at 6:56 pm



February 23, 2012 at 8:47 pm



Jen @ And Two More Makes FIVE February 24, 2012 at 10:04 am

I just read your teenage daughter post and cried.

My nearly full-time stepdaughter is 11. Going on 15. Or maybe 17. Or maybe 2. I suspect the teenage years will be a long road.

But your post echos ao much of what I feel. Like every. single. sentiment. I’m so afraid and so unsure and so worried I’ll fail at this tremendous responsibility of raising a human being. So much more freaked out at the possiblity of my failure than tackling the temper tantrums of my two year-old toddler twins. Because, at the end of the day, a hug and a kiss (or maybe a cookie) will solve all of a toddler’s problems. No so for my eleven year-old. Her world is so much more complex. And my interactions with her are so much more complex. And I can’t fix everything. And sometimes I can’t fix anything. And sometimes (okay, okay, most of the time) I am the problem.

I love her and I hate her and sometimes she does things of which I am amazingly proud and other times I’m afraid she will not morph into the person she’s supposed to be. She changes from moment-to-moment. And I feel so amazingly inadequate. How do I do this better than my mother? I’m sure it’s only because I’ve only been mothering her since she was five and I’m sure I would be ultra-competent if I had her since babyhood. Yeah, right. I wish we got some mothering microchip.

But it’s so beautiful to see others freak out about the same things that I freak out about.

It’s simply beautiful to know we all feel like horrible parents.

Which probably means it will all be okay. Because we feel like it’s important enough to worry this much.


February 24, 2012 at 10:30 pm

As far as cat’s appearances go, what differentiates a Chuck from a Chucky? I’m with Mama…many crazy people around.


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