Saturday Night Special

by Marinka on October 1, 2012

Saturday night  is Husbandrinka’s turn to cook which means that at 7 pm I’m starving and he’s saying things like “any ideas about dinner?”  Needless to say I am too weak to answer so I just shoo the flies away from landing on my lip.

“Why don’t we go out to eat?” he suggests after checking the “already made, just needs heating” section of our refrigerator and not coming up with a damn thing.

“YES!” Young Ladrinka shouts and then chants Vapiano! Vapiano! which, in my opinion, is a restaurant in name only. It’s not that the food isn’t good, except that is the reason exactly. But they make a pizza in animal shapes and that apparently passes for gourmet in kid world.

As a famine victim, however, I can’t really argue, so it’s a plan.

And in a few moments, Husbanrinka, Young Ladrinka and I are all ready, and I go into my daughter’s room to see what the holdup is and it seems to be the fact that she’s painting her toenails. Yes, a pre-dinner pedicure, because why not?

I explain to her in a few well chosen explicatives why this isn’t Prime Pedicure Time and we finally all walk out the door and as we’re heading towards the “restaurant” we notice that all traffic on our street is stopped and that there appear to be undercover police offers who have one person up against the car, and another on the ground near the car and it’s all very OMG! and there are a kazillion (or maybe 7) people gathered around looking at what’s going on and asking each other what happened and no one knows anything.

So of course we all want to stay and see what unfolds, except when I say “we all” I need to exclude my son because he’s very “they’re criminals, let’s get out of here!” And although I try to explain about the presumption of innocence that attaches to everyone who enters the criminal justice system, he doesn’t seem very open-minded constitutionally speaking, so just a heads up, you may not want him on your jury, if you get my drift.

And then we see police cars with lights blaring driving up the wrong way on Fifth Avenue to get to our crime scene and my son is all “let’s just go to dinner” like he can’t wait to get the hell out of there and my daughter is more tolerant with the announcement of “Omg, I love crime!”

“You love crime?” I ask. Because this is certainly a fun development in any parent’s life.  Sure, many parents try to instill a love of crime from an early age, but to just have it happen so organically is beyond what most parents dare dream about.

“Yes!” she’s obviously in her element, inching closer to the undercover cops and the action.

We finally left, but not before Husbandrinka and I agreed that the undercover cops looked like teenagers  (and incidentally ones that you wouldn’t want to sit next to on the subway, their disguises were that good!) and over dinner, after being Mirandized, our daughter explained that when she declared her commitment to a life of crime, she meant forensic science because it’s the most interesting aspect of science for her.

So that’s certainly a relief.

Or a reminder of why no one should leave their house ever. Either one.


Did I already force you to become a fan of my page on Facebook? I have no idea what it means, but you should do it because it’s lifesaving or something.


One year ago ...

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{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }

October 1, 2012 at 3:48 am

Well that’s a relief she doesn’t want real to be a criminal…and at least she didn’t want to run away with the circus too…although if she ever ventures into NYC politics she could accomplish both, and be pretty well off for it ! Ha !! 🙂


Tinne from Tantrums and Tomatoes October 1, 2012 at 7:22 am

And this is why I always cook dinner. That way we don’t have to leave the house nor interrupt important toe-nail-painting-sessions.


Alexandra October 1, 2012 at 8:17 am

” … shooing the flies away from my mouth … ”



October 1, 2012 at 9:19 am

Your husband’s approach to dinner making sounds a lot like mine. Same with your daughter’s approach to the appropriate time to paint one’s toe nails.


October 1, 2012 at 10:46 am

Don’t leave us hanging. What was all the fuss about?


joeinvegas October 1, 2012 at 11:41 am

No delivery in your block? I thought he would have a drawer full of menus by now.


Lady Jennie October 1, 2012 at 12:04 pm

She’s been watching Bones. I, too, have had a midlife crisis and have decided I want to be a socially inept forensic anthropologist.


Stephanie Hobson October 1, 2012 at 1:59 pm

Your daughter and my granddaughter sound like twins, love for crime and last minute pedicures et al. This weekend when I asked her if she was planning on going to college (as a subtle reminder that yes indeed, she does actually have to complete and turn in her homework), her reply was “Duh… do you think they will let me cut open dead bodies without a degree?”


Laurie October 1, 2012 at 3:53 pm

I’m thinking that if I get Young Ladrinka on my jury I could just mention that I make pizza in animal shapes and I’d totally have him on my side.


October 1, 2012 at 9:01 pm

When Young Ladrinka shouts “Vapiano! Vapiano!” he becomes a heartwarming Pixar character.


October 4, 2012 at 8:26 am

You know I did fan you on fb (is that the right phrase?) and I hardly ever see your updates. I must have too much crap in my feed …and not enough Marinka!


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