I can’t really tell you what happened, because it’s way too painful, but in flashback form- toilet clogged, water rising, then water receding and lots of tissues in toilet, Marinka puts hand in to pluck tissues out and save the day but omg, hand touches something that is not tissue.
This is all I have at this time.
Also, I’m sorry about the imminent shortage of hand sanitizer on the continental United States, but under the circumstances I’m sure you’ll understand and also if anyone has a Groupon for a limb amputation, kindly pass it along.
I’ll be back as soon as I stop gagging.
* * *
I’m back, but still gagging.
Here are some acceptable comments to leave:
I’m so sorry!
OMG, you’re like a heroine! A modern day Joan of Arc!
One day, you’ll think back on this and laugh!
Your hair looks absolutely fantastic!
Here are examples of comments that it is not ok to leave:
EWWW! So gross!
What kind of a moron sticks her hand in the toilet?
Thank you for your attention to this matter. Have a nice day. Which, by the way, is a lot easier to do on days that you don’t accidentally touch excrement.