Everyone Hates You

by Marinka on June 20, 2011

I don’t know what’s going on with Husbandrinka.

I merely mentioned that everyone who reads my blog hates him and is on my side on the whole “sorry I can’t make Young Ladrinka’s birthday party with eleven of his closest friends” and he gets really defensive.

I don’t like people who can’t face reality. It’s not becoming.

“Did you happen to mention to these people that the reason that I can’t make it to the party is because you moved the time from 2 p.m. to noon without telling me and I have a 10 am meeting that I scheduled for the morning specifically because I wanted to be at my son’s birthday party?” he asks.

If there’s one thing I hate is people who try to overwhelm other people with “facts” just to try to make a point.

“Well, I didn’t want to burden my readers with all the minutiae. They wouldn’t be able to follow that stuff.” I make a vague hand gesture around my temple that signifies that people who read this blog are much too beautiful and gorgeous to bother with concepts of time. And by “my temple” I mean my house of worship. Why, what were you thinking?

“Right. Your readers,” he says.

“Why are you putting emotional quotes around readers?” I ask him. It’s not like I said my public or anything.

“Never mind. I just think you should be accurate. Did you mention in this blog post that I will be at the party, just half an hour late?”

Excuse me, do I need to have legal representation at this point? Because I don’t understand why I’m being subjected to this cross-examination. I know my rights. Arrest me or release me! (Thanks, Law & Order!)

“No,” I confess. There’s only so much grilling that I can take. I’m delicate.

“And why not?”

“Because I thought that people would be less sympathetic towards me if they knew that you’d be there after all.”

“I’ll see you at 12:30,” he said.

And to his credit, he did get there at 12:30. Just as the ambulance was whisking me away, so the boys weren’t unattended for long.

Fine, there was no ambulance.

But wouldn’t it have been a much better post if there had been?!

This is what you’re missing.

Please make sure to thank Husbandrinka on your way out.

______________________

Today, on The Mouthy Housewives: A very special episode where we help a woman who gets turned off by her partner’s sex-talk? Can you have great sex and not have to answer “who’s your daddy?” Don’t miss Kristine’s answer!

One year ago ...

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{ 26 comments… read them below or add one }

Halala Mama
Twitter:
June 20, 2011 at 12:10 am

Was this explanation Husbandrinka’s Father’s Day gift? Didn’t he have you on a budget at one point? He might want to rethink that. 😉 Also, perhaps instead of “readers” you should refer to them as “your adoring public” or “followers” or “minions.”

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Anthony from CharismaticKid
Twitter:
June 20, 2011 at 12:10 am

You should have a video interview feature of your husbandrinka or whatever so we can really see what he’s like.

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Cecilia June 20, 2011 at 12:49 am

I love the belated honesty! Oh, bythewayI’vebeenreadingyourblogformonthsnow-withoutcommentingoracknowledgingyourexistence.

So, umm. You crack me up.

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Sophie@Fabrications June 20, 2011 at 2:08 am

As I’ve said before, you are a saint, Marinka.

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Lady Jennie June 20, 2011 at 5:27 am

Oh well that’s so good to know, because my husband and I stayed up last night for, like HOURS, talking about what a bad husband Husbandrinka is and how lucky I am that Sir is so much better. He’ll be so relieved when I tell him.

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Lady Jennie June 20, 2011 at 5:29 am

(you got that that was joking and not sarcasm right? you know that I adore your blog and laugh at everything you say except when you’re not trying to be funny, because written word can be taken SO out of context and be given innuendos of hissing that were never meant to be there in the first place, and I wouldn’t want to spoil your day like that mwah!)

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GrandeMocha
Twitter:
June 20, 2011 at 7:10 am

I’m just glad the truth came out.

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From Belgium June 20, 2011 at 7:18 am

I’m dissapointed at the lack of an ambulance, but glad you survived.

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Alison@Mama Wants This
Twitter:
June 20, 2011 at 8:30 am

Who tells the complete story in their blogs anyway?

You mean, we’re required to??? 🙂

Glad you survived the outing.

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Alexandra
Twitter:
June 20, 2011 at 8:33 am

See?

I understand EXACTLY how you told the story.

Sheesh…all these people that think “the devil is in the details.” (Thanks, NPR.)

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Alexandra
Twitter:
June 20, 2011 at 8:34 am

I”m also going to steal and use “arrest me or release me.”

I love that one.

Must watch law and order.

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Becky
Twitter:
June 20, 2011 at 9:38 am

And I thought I was the only person who gained my legal expertise from Law & Order. I see I’m in good company.

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Lynn MacDonald (All Fooked Up)
Twitter:
June 20, 2011 at 10:05 am

I love dissing my husband in my blog…even when it’s not his fault. Actually, especially when it’s his fault. The other side of the situation is that guys like that are LUCKY enough to married to gals like us right? RIGHT?

Well, that’s what i think

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annie June 20, 2011 at 10:13 am

details are over rated!

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Peajaye
Twitter:
June 20, 2011 at 10:27 am

But surely there was an ambulance by the end of the movie… Or did you really get through “The Green Lantern” without medical attention?

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dusty earth mother June 20, 2011 at 12:07 pm

I totally got your temple reference even before you explained it. I’m very very sharp that way. And I cannot believe Husbandrinka missed half an hour of his son’s party and will be alerting DYFS in your behalf.

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Polish Mama on the Prairie
Twitter:
June 20, 2011 at 12:42 pm

A 1/2 hour?? With 12 tweenage boys? Still an emergency wine/vodka-in-a-bag moment, if you ask me.

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Meredith L.
Twitter:
June 20, 2011 at 1:01 pm
A Mommy in the City
Twitter:
June 20, 2011 at 3:22 pm

Glad you made it out okay and so happy husbandrinka could make it for the party!

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Minka
Twitter:
June 20, 2011 at 3:34 pm

It’s frightening and yet fabulous how many of us seem to follow your logic one-hundred percent. Like he couldn’t change his business meeting yet again? C’mon. It’s a kid’s birthday party…! (how’s that for solidarity?)

I am guilty of the same shit, and yet I don’t feel the least bit bad about it. And thanks to law & order (which I no longer watch, because I feel like I’m watching paint-by-numbers, only with moving parts), I’ve learned that makes me a bit of a sociopath.

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Kimberly June 20, 2011 at 3:55 pm

I prefer to be called an online friend.

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Eevie June 20, 2011 at 7:16 pm

I’m not sure why Husbandrika wants to stand in your way of the Oscar equivalent of the Bloggy Awards. Did Faulkner have to explain to his readers that parts of his story were exaggerated for dramatic effect? No, he did not. Did Mother Goose have to write into her rhymes that the fork didn’t actually run away with the spoon, but that rather, the spoon and the fork went on a date while the cow watched their kid, the spork? NO, she did not.

This is very bad behavior, Husbandrika.

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Eevie June 20, 2011 at 7:17 pm

I’m sorry, I was so full of outraged, I mistyped Husbandrinka’s name. I am ashamed.

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Jeanne June 20, 2011 at 7:39 pm

Husbandrinka and Old Dog should hang out.

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Miss Britt
Twitter:
June 21, 2011 at 10:30 am

Husbands need to get their own damn blog if they’re going to be worried about details like time and backstory.

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Penbleth
Twitter:
June 21, 2011 at 3:03 pm

Details, schmetails. It’s the story that’s important.

Reply

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